


The Worst Baseball Team Around

by hottwunk420



Category: Tales from the Gas Station
Genre: Baseball
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-28
Updated: 2020-11-28
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:14:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27754420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hottwunk420/pseuds/hottwunk420
Summary: "Sweet cheeks you absolutely one hundred percenterinos gotta look at this shit!" Jerry said as he slapped a flyer on the counter.I read over the piece of eyestrainingly colored paper advertising a baseball tournament and sighed "Jerry we don't even know enough people for a team who don't want to kill us."He grinned widely "The game is on Saturday and I already made sure you're off. I'll get us a team."
Kudos: 4





	The Worst Baseball Team Around

Saturday came and I found myself sitting in my car at the high school's baseball field. I could smell the morning dew and mud without even opening the door. Jerry had given me a pink t-shirt with "Flaming Flamingos" hand written on the front with a puffy white fabric glue, with his rendition of the animal under the lettering. He had also written my last name on the back that wasn't even a little misspelled. I had slipped it on over a long sleeved shirt and grabbed a baseball cap my foster brother had left to get into the mood before I left. 

Exiting my car, I could hear what was most likely my team immediately. If I had to guess, somewhere on the field, Rosa was giving Jerry a very strong lecture. As I got closer, I got to know the subject matter. 

Rosa was cross armed and staring up at Jerry who was… holding a pink shirt clad Rocco. 

"You can't just make him play! How did you even manage to get him into that shirt?!?" Rosa exclaimed.

Jerry pet the most likely rabid animal, who was suspiciously cuddled up to him "Well that parts easy, the little bastard stole my ecstasy laced twinky and boom! The final teammate!"

Rosa looked like she was in speedrunning the human aging process, and as our eyes met, I could see the relief. "Jack could you tell him how bad of an idea this is?" she sounded desperate.

I executed my superior socializing and conflict resolution skills by shrugging. Jerry held the disturbingly calm raccoon under the shoulders and waved his toddler sized body back and forth. He accompanied this action by saying "But he's so cuuuuuuute. Wait I got one more thing," he tucked Rocco under one elbow to dig a small baseball cap with an elastic band out of his pocket, promptly putting it on Rocco, who licked his hand "Check it out!"

Rosa quite literally facepalmed and I couldn't blame her in the slightest. 

"Hey Townsend! Figured I'd see you here." The voice came from behind me but I could have recognized it anywhere. 

I whipped around to see Spencer Middleton walking into the field wearing… the team's pink shirt. The sleeves were even rolled up and he had on these stupid looking cut off shorts. Under his arm was our longest standing part timer (one month!) Simon. Since Simon had at least half a foot on Spencer without his afro, he was awkwardly bent down but at least didn't seem to be concerned for his safety. 

However, Rosa and I were, for both him and ourselves. Rosa began lecturing Jerry all over again. I heard things like "He tried to kill us," and "that man is absolutely and completely dangerous" only to be rebutted by Jerry's defense of "He owed me a favor or three!"

I was busy focusing on the smug look on Spencer's face as he finished his approach and preparing to practice for the tournament with his skull if need be. "Loosen up your grip, Jack. We don't need you losing it before the game even starts," Spencer said, "I'm just here to play some baseball, there's no harm in that, right?" His hand slipped off Simon's shoulder and into Simon's, who straightened up to his full height. 

I sighed "Just, please don't try anything. I am not in the mood to get an assult charge."

Simon's eyebrows shot up "What?"

I furrowed my eyebrows in response. I swear if people didn't have vocal cords they'd communicate via eyebrows. Or hand signals, like sign language. I hadn't been practicing my asl like I promised Jerry, I'd have to either come up with practice time or an apology. Then I remembered that I was supposed to answer "Spencer is a psychopath, sorry. I thought I went over the code red procedure with you." 

He seemed confused "You said we didn't have a code red. I haven't seen any weird behavior from him on any of our dates though." 

Oh, of course he was dating Spencer, why the hell not? I gave him a small piece of my infinite wisdom "Good luck with that."

I looked around and did a quick headcount. There were six of us, including myself and Rocco. If I had to guess who the other three might be, I'd guess O'brien and Benji at least. I had no idea who the third could be. I saw the other team on the opposite side of the field, looking to be some middle aged hunting enthusiasts, including Travis. 

I saw two women wearing pink shirts approaching us. Neither was O'brien, unfortunately. Maybe that was for the best since Spencer might still be a wanted criminal? I hadn't gotten around to checking. 

The one on the right was a short east asian woman with short black hair tucked under a baseball cap and a take-no-shit look on her face. The one on the left was Kara, she was in my graduating class. She was a tall white woman almost as lanky as Simon with stringy, long, brown hair and an I'm-only-a-little-high look on her face. Personally, I was a bit glad to see them both. Chances were, they were both far better teammates than a raccoon or a serial killer. 

Kara smiled widely and popped her gum before she said "Hey Jack! Been a while huh? Jerry invited me to this game. This is Cara, with a C."

I held out my hand to Cara who promptly shook it "It's nice to meet you, my name is Jack Townsend."

She nodded. "So I've heard."

I didn't have any idea how to respond so I just stood there. 

Kara saved the conversation "I'm guessing that big guy is the last player?"

I turned around to see Benji. I waved and headed back over to meet him at the junction that was Rosa and Jerry having a heated discussion on whether or not knives were allowed, which Spencer added onto only occasionally. 

I asked the obvious question "So is O'brien coming or…" while looking down at Rocco, who was now curled around Jerry's neck.

Rosa answered "She's working today I think, hopefully she can join later. This is, against my judgement, everyone."

Almost on cue, I heard a whistle blow. Everyone turned to see none other than O'brien dressed in that black and white referee shirt. She used a megaphone to announce "That's everyone, let's play ball."


End file.
